gongshang primary anglican high PAE victoria jc<3 turning seventeen in december

One day
I woke up,
made myself comfortable in the swivel chair
&placed my fingers on the keyboard.
only to realize that the alphabets on the keyboard
had been rearranged by gnomes while I slumbering deep
{how did I know? they left a Post-It of course.{
"ofdj ytsunf
nodkahy lvse tou psu wlselu"
Strangely, I could understand perfectly
&I immediately started to type.








promise you wont see this &think,
see she's at it again-
why the promises when promises don't count?
I promised to be truthful but
truth aint nothing when
words don't form
words don't form when breaths
rn't sucked in to fill the many little pockets
of emptiness: to fill my different
different personalities
but they are
all the same ;blown up by the same stale air
yet so terribly different
&unrecognizable,
so why can't you tell Me from
Me?


each time I fall apart I get pieced back together
by someone, something {pls accept my thankyous
everyone is imperfect in one way or another
so in an attempt to save me
those fallen pieces crudely are
glued back together
some pieces have lost their place
some just can't fit no matter how hard you don't try
some; unreachable so you replaced em
wiv something different
everytime I recover I'm somebody else

so who am I to blame anyone or anything
for having moulded me
;into somebody
I don't know anymore

everytime I say
"I'm okay I'm fine
How bout you? I'm okay I really am It's okay I'm fine
I promise I'll tell you when I need you I really am okay





I know you care about me but worry about yourself,
trust me I'm fine" ,I'm a little less.








________________________________________________________<________3
I left to sit around for a while
away from the computer this mad asskicking machine.
now that I'm back, I'm changed
&I'm no longer the angry girl who had something
to say now.
don't know who this time.
probably someone calmer.
someone.... who knows everything would still go
unheard anyway,
so this someone would not bother.




I'm okay I'm fine
How bout you? I'm okay I really am It's okay I'm fine
I promise I'll tell you when I need you I really am okay





I know you care about me but worry about yourself,
trust me I'm fine











The following day I woke up as usual
the jumbled keyboard's keys were still jumbled
lined in perfect disorder.
covering the letters 'P' 'F' 'D' 'J' 'S' 'W'
was another yellow Post-It, from the gnomes,
which I would never read to you.

calanthea
gwynneth
yongzhi
bzzzz
weitheng
melissa
joanne
kingston
weeho
wenjun
tingli
xin rong
jiemin


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oh won't you(...)

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