OKAY HI,YOU,DRINK THIS ALL IN.
Standing on the rooftops,
Everybody scream your heart out.
THE WRITTEN WORD
Thursday, December 28, 2006, 4:37 AM
happy 28th december:D
it hardly fee;s real,i don't feel any different now
why am i expecting to feel different,technically i'm just a day older
;]
thank you girlfs & weeho spending birthday with me,
the cake was scrummy,cute and
such a surprise<3!
though what we did was just..chat,slp,watch tv, {yt dozes off}, chat, uhm miss the sunrise
i still feel loved and happy that i've got yall to spend my birthday with,
so <3girlfs! {IMPENDING PROJECT: project within breadtalk box heh}
&thanks weeho for comingg .lending me your jacket when i freezed my butt off
&helping me carry mahjong set.
though you shd thank me instead,since carrying it around for so long
hve caused you to develop some muscles:D
&thanks MUCHIES ALL,for the wishes.such a pleasant feeling to receive nearly twenty wishes
whooo hahah record breaking man,last year i received like wht,FIVE!?
:D even daddums messaged me from ovrseas to wish me tday.
however my bastarded phone chose to die like.half an hour after i turned 16{kay so i chose not to charge it beforehand}
so dear wishers,do forgive late replies/no replies,
i do appreciate the messages a lot!
_
oh yeah and i missed clubbing tnight,{thrs an underaged party at momo}
in fear of worrying mama and upsetting her when i return at ungodly hours.
Wwoaah MATURE SIXTN YR'OL TING hahaha
heh still,i find it awesome to turn up for an underaged party,freshly legal, freshly sixteen.it's the rain as well.i'm sick of the weather..
who wansta dress up &end up looking....drenched.
plus i dont really fancy spending the rest of my birthday
in a stifling,dark,smoky place.
oh well thrs always time for it next time,that's for sure.
OKAY. in remembrance of this day IM POSTING THIS GOREGELICIOUS PICT OL'MINE LOLL
i love aaall
Wednesday, December 27, 2006, 1:36 AM
grandaddy's condition's getting worse,
so we can only visit,and hope for the best
but im looking at it with different eyes now,life is bad
if you allow it to be.may my relatives be strong enough to
endure the long visiting hours.. i can't thank my friends enough for being
caring,concerned, and just damned good friends.
heart yall with all my heart
Monday, December 25, 2006, 7:40 PM
picture taken weeks ago.
i spent the whole time reminding myself,it's christmas,
but
so..
..have i been that bad a girl,santa?
Sunday, December 24, 2006, 11:40 PM
1*marcus in his spiffy outfit.
2*inability to look into viewfinder
3*BOOGIEING
4*ben peh's morbid forkintherose in the daawn
5*dancefloor.{it IS a dancefloor!}
6*yongzhi!
7*melvin looking sinister!LOL
8*ooh ooh hair
9*jo!
there are more prom pictures but im just too lazy my com is uber laggy ,hence it takes
about an eternity to post pictures.
my relatives liked my dress when i showed them the pictures so it's a good christmas eve.
may tomorrow be JUST GREAT.
, 3:23 PM
PROM PICTURES AT LAST.
Saturday, December 23, 2006, 11:43 PM
Monday, December 18, 2006, 11:00 PM
oh..yes,
not wanting to do anything to salvage things{actually i dont see it that way}
is because
any [WORD REMOVED] thing i do will just worsen things lah.
like every move.every word uttered.BLOGGING.
TESTED.AND.PROVEN.
lol.i just want stop this selfpity,
what have i done wrong,what did i not do.was i that hateful
how come,why, this crying{oh is this bring out nasty thoughts like 'ooh look now
she's seeking sympathy from others'} for nights wondering ,wondering.
wait a lil,what have you done wrong,what have you not done?
every frickn thing i do
will sort of displease you. lol
sometimes i wonder if somehow along the way,
you just developed this SOMETHING agnst me.
that sounds retarded when put into words,but somehow it's a question which
is pretty real.
calanthea is right,
i should learn to care less about it,
be less affected, when everyone has stopped caring already.
i should learn to dismiss your thoughts,actions,and slowly you{though i dont
really want to}, it's necessary to not be hurt by the thoughtlessness{such word?} of others.
ooh this is a frickn childish post lah.lol.
i just want to 'get it out' of my system.not like it's out now
but i still love cal gwyn and yongzhi
hm so i need to sleep and wake up feeling different about THIS
or
not think about this at all.
cus now it's like 'it's beyond redemption oh fuck,nevermind.
oh fuck,NEVERMIND!?'
lol.nights all
, 10:35 PM
Now I’m on my own side
It’s better than being on your side
It’s my fault when you're blind
It’s better that I see it through your eyes
_
it's not wrong for you to feel this, but i just am upset
at you,at how things are,at myself
am i even upset at all?i shd be..but if i'd to compare with the last time,
im less upset,definitely.
& i don't know what to do..more of ,i don't know
if anything i do will be of any use,is there anything else to do,
plus,since when did wanting to do anything at all become so hard?
you mattered so much,so much more than the measly
amount you allowed yourself to remember
but it's human to get used to not needing,not wanting
anymore. maybe.who can blame me?maybe you got used to it too,
i won't blame you,although i want to.i can't even distinguish
if it's baseless blame anymore.
selfish.
_
Maybe it’s best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.
_
are you gone yet.
hve the weights been lifted,at all?
would i rather be left alone.then again,maybe not.
yes emoemo?the frustration this would cause.l.o.l.
Friday, December 15, 2006, 7:34 AM
TODAY, i want to be happy
so im going to compile a list of things which makes me happy/which will make me happy.
HAHAH and NOO it's not a birthday wishlist,seriously,
but basically it's gnna be
a very allaboutmemememee selfcentred post
_being happy on my bday CUS IM ALWAYS NOT VERY HAPPY ON BIRTHDAYS so irritating.
though last yr was fine.
_finding a job,yes now in mid decs{like who'll hire now} so i wont be so broke!
i need the dosh to buy xmas presents and to shop ,ive got about a million things i wnna buy for friends and myself?!
_watching Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind on xmas eve while feasting on raw fish with that scrummy blend of japsoyasauce{?} and wasabi
OR
salted popcorn and cotton candy!.
_TO DANCE TO DANCE yes i'd love to go dance in a club as long as
it aint disgustingly squeezy.boo to people who dance too close.
buy yiting a ticket to the clubs right now!
_knowing that it's like 9 oclock when i wake up.LOL knowing it's 9 when i wake up makes me happy.
_to know if i shd celebrate my birthday this year.=[
_to have painted nails for xmas, like just painting
,do away with cutesy/poshy manicures.i alr hve a colour in mind;]]
_going out with the people i lovee
_to have an inexpensive hp bill for the month I CALLED LIKE CRAZY
_camwhoreing on birthday and xmas & actually look nice in the pictures
_getting to know nice people in my short vjc life.lol you knw the things they say!about vjc! im praying i'll leave before ever finding out anything bad
_getting a score of better than 12 for olvls.
_getting in SAJC !lead a happy life thr,get good results there
_being nicer to people
_coming up with the super fab way of spending xmas.{unlikely!}
_family being closer ,and happier
_meeting up with joanne for dinner!
_going shopping!miraculously hundreds of dollars WILL fall from the sky so i can
buy all the eyecandy ive seen in the malls!
_getting a bronzed healthylooking tan
_that zara jacket!
_finding the mango dress just to stare at it once more:D I SWEAR IT'S GOONE
_getting THE belt.
_BLEMISH FREE SKIN!;D shite!i hvnt washed my face for the whole day
_my lovely lovely friends
_reading this book i saw in mph goodness.how long has it been since we've properly read
_being inspired to take more photographs
_DANCING
_new clothes.im becoming such an addict.
_getting to e a waitress at the whatsit'snamehotel if they'd want me
_receiving wordy xmas cards!
_sending wordy xmas cards!
_________
okay ,before i start feeling halfhearted about the compilation of
The List Of Happy Things,
i shall stop here.:D for now.those're the things.
, 12:26 AM
anyway if no one gets what my previous two posts are about, if anything came out wrong,
what i was trying to put across was that i want to salvage the friendship
it still means to me.
but strangely evrything ive done,and said ,
were not thought to be an attempt to salvage,
see, because
the funny thing is however i try, it is just perceived wrongly by you.
i mean people can do nothing but they just dont get on your nerves.
OH FOR HEAVENS SAKE DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING AGAINST ME is a question which is so very real. oh god
but i don't know why.
maybe it's because you DONT hve anything against me and i dreamt the whole thing up.
if this isn't permanent
if to you,this is sthg which can be worked out,
then hve the decency to inform everyone.
cus isnt 'man this is falling apart beyond redemption.' in our minds.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006, 1:42 AM
faith oh faith where have you gone
have i lost you?
Sunday, December 03, 2006, 4:17 PM
a night of living life unknown to self.two nights. hushh
i forgot to wish you a happy december.
we meet again!