!HELLO SAAAAY.

THE WRITTEN WORD

Sunday, April 01, 2007, 1:37 AM

,i shut my eyes.
i always did the things i was always doing
sometimes it feels like a power has been unleashed,a power which was formerly
caged up in my ribs,
and now it has left to roam my insides.i want it caged again,
or lose it forever,so i don't feel its slight flutter from time to time.

i beg for surcease.

_

my words can twist the new realities into
undecipherable fables,it's unintentional it's unintentional
but i'm the worst kind of sad,biting the inside of my cheeks and locking the
bedroom door.
nothing can happen,i'll dream up my goodbye letters, most of the time i just wait for something to happen.
{usually nothing does}it doesn't take an imagination too vivid to see you ,shifty-eyed
.staring pointedly at your feet which walked their ways in and out of hearts.

with a raised voice i will look deep into you and say my goodbyes vulgarly
quick,explosive speech
what happened to what was planned initially?a slow g-o -o - d- b - y- e,
each letter
slipping past your lips,sinking comfortably into the space where your stomach lies
this comprehension will light up your weary eyes,'this separation is for forever?'
my words has to be carefully sculpted and
transparent,in order for me to see the resignation in your eyes
when you realize it is me you love,and will love for all your life

i guess a few seconds later, you realize your thinly-veined hands can keep me by your side,
so you wave goodbye.

and a sinking sense of finality tugs at my heartstrings from the field outside,from outside this home,
from all the places where you can't possibly exist in.
as i wonder if
self-pity stems from a deepest sympathy,
a watching-from-afar-from-behind-the-line-spectator sort of feeling for myself,

the worst kind of sadness stalk the darkest streets,
infiltrates at will even in the presence of bright light,

_________
{taken from september 2006 posts lawl
a good read,d'tcha think?HAHAH
it has been so long since ive written.
sometimes, it's odd to read smthng written by you,
and how you can still relate to it, in the oddest ways.}

every inch of skin.our cheeks can brush
here.keep still
you roasting hearts,

hello april.